the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
