that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
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