well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Let's paint friendship bongs
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Randomize