Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
