2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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