eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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