Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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