Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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