So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
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my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
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Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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