And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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