i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
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