spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
