I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
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She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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