Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
