those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
