she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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