I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
