She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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