if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
