Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Do vagina's smell?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
