Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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