I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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