if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
they need to just BURY HIM!
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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