Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
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four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
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I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
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