If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
one two three fourrrrnication!
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
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