just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
