I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
