you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
You don't make any sense
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