Screwed.edu
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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