Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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