What did we do last night that was yellow?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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