we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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