We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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