the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
