no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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