Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
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