Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Randomize
