if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
