3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
is this the sara with the beer cane?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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