Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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