so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize