dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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