Whatcha textin bout Willis?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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