Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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