dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Randomize
