Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
