Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's shark week go big or go home
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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