Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
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