so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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