the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Who died my cat blue again?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
