Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
