Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize